Cobra Brigade

Jack and Buck

Sat, 18 Aug 2007 14:47:07 -0500

For those of you that are interested in the saga that is the Cubs vs. Cards and Jack and Buck’s secret love affair with each other under the grandstand, then listen up. I just received word that Cobra and Rampage will be seated in the 6^th row, directly behind homeplate. So tune into Fox and catch a glimpse of these two jokers and a couple of Cobra Brigade fans, aka Skyler and Jack Klompus.

When questioned about how they actually got these tickets, Jack was very vague and refused to give details. All I know is that it involved a desperate Buck, dirty knees, a burly German scalper, and something about being behind a dumpster…

Breaking News San Diago

Fri, 17 Aug 2007 18:32:22 -0500

When Buck and Jack left for Chicago today it was all smiles but our wayward travelers were blown off course when Buck's truck blew up in Indianapolis. Forced to listen to the game on the radio, our venture brothers were just passing Lafayette in the third inning. Where are they now? I have no idea. Did they make it to Wrigley before the end of the game? I have no idea. Are the Cubs going to resign Carlos Zambrano? Yes they are, with a 5 year deal worth about 90 million. I wonder if 90 million spent wisely could engineer me a mutated mantis capable of leveling a city block in an hour or so...

Welcome to the ThunderDome

Thu, 16 Aug 2007 23:46:37 -0500

Bruce Paine has friends that aren't Jack and the boys, if you can believe it. They are the kinds of friends that like to see bad things happen to me, and I like to see bad things happen to them, it is funnier that way. Now that I say it out loud, that is the way Jack and Buck think, maybe all of my friends are that way... One of my good friends, The Chief, believes that one of the funniest moment of his life was watching Bruce Paine get eight of his fingers broken at once. He knew that it meant that I wouldn't be able work for several weeks since we worked with our hands and he knew that the loss of income would threaten my livelyhood and rob me of all my hobbies which included basketball, baseball, video games, and painting. It was as near catastrophic as an injury situation could get for me. When he began laughing I understood, though, and didn't mind. I would get my shot. When his last girlfriend was whisked away by a man 30 years her senior because he "had his act together" and was "closer to accomplishing his goals" I laughed myself hoarse and then told every single mother-f*cking person I saw for two years.
The Chief and I have always asked ourselves deep, philosophic questions to help ourselves pass time and to present a situation where we can judge others by the lameness of their response. We have few rules but one cannot answer with the same response of someone else and you can't talk your way out of it. Often, when faced with the question, insecure people will begin asking questions of their own in a thinly veiled attempt to discover what kind of answer will gain the highest approval and thereby become the best. We call those people out. Historically the topics range widely. Examples are as follows:
If you could die in any battle in history which would you choose and what side would you have been on?

If you were marooned on an unpopulated tropical island what item would you take with you?

If you had to cannibalize one Hogan, which would you choose, Paul Hogan or Hulk Hogan?

Are you a pirate, a lumberjack, or a cowboy?

I was searching the net using the word "spider church" and found this, and I realized the blog hit on a conversation Chief and I had two years ago:

If you could take any one really small creature and make it really big, which creature would you choose and how big would it be?

Chief posed the question and I immediately tried to go first but he jumped the gun, and knowing we both wanted the same thing, he claimed a giant spider the instant after he asked the question. I wanted a giant spider badly, probably for the same reason he wanted one, and it pissed me off to not get it. I pondered. A snake was too cliche, and when I said I wanted a rhinoceros the size of the Pentagon I was informed that a rhino was bigger than the starting size. We then debated the starting size and determined that it must be smaller than an average dog. That was the point when we decided that the really big thing had to start small. I was dejected. I thought I should go scorpion, because I could accomplish much of the same goal I had for a giant spider with the scorpion but it would have appeared as though I was coat-tailing Chief's choice.

I need help. I have to come up with something sweet but it has to start small, too. It has to carry with it enough intrinsic dread that it could be used to terrorize a Japanese city or, perhaps, Chicago. It also has to be naturally aggressive enough that its introduction into the world would necessitate the calling out of the National Guard and maybe the regular army and air corps. Once created, its name will be Jim.

Oh, and the secondary part of the question was what really big creature would you make really small and how small would it be?

Lame answers at this point range from making a koala six feet tall and making a giant panda ten inches tall. Another crappy one was making a whale a mile long. Not only did they blow the making big things small and small things big part but they did it with no humor at all.

Cobra Brigade Road Show

Thu, 16 Aug 2007 13:01:50 -0500

Buck Rampage and I are going to be hitting the road this weekend for a road trip to Wrigley Field to watch the much anticipated match-up between ~~good and evil~~ the Cubs and Cardinals. Buck is a Cardinals fan.....I am a Cubs fan. He will be wearing his vintage 1988 Pedro Guerrero Jersey (with jheri curl and 'stache) and I will be wearing my Cubs hat and t-shirt. It will be his first visit to Wrigley.....I've been there many times.

Ok, that nearly put me to sleep, but it had to be done. We are heading up there this weekend for the game on Saturday and ~~on Monday~~ when we sober up we are going to post a recap for you guys....with pictures...from the point of view of a Cubs fan and a Cardinals fan. Not only that though, I'm going to give you guys a complete rundown of everything that happens over the weekend as Rampage certainly will go Cougar hunting again while I sit at the bar and egg him on. Also, other things that will be happening this weekend include: 1) Me talking Buck into running on the field, 2) Me mercilessly screaming at Rick Ankiel if we sit in the right field bleachers, 3) Buck blacking out on Saturday night and waking up in Aisle 2 of a White Hen Pantry on Sunday morning, 4) Buck harassing cab drivers so much that it leads to arrest, 5) Buck starting a fight.

As far as actual baseball information, we all know what the deal is with the Cubs and the Cardinals. The Cubs are struggling and the Cards are streaking. So much so, that by the end of their four game series on Monday....the Cardinals could have leap frogged the Cubs in the NL Central. As you can see, this is going to be a very intense, hard fought series.

You Want a NCAA Football Schedule?

Thu, 16 Aug 2007 10:06:36 -0500

2007_NCAAF_Schedule.xls
We'll see how this works....Hopefully by clicking on that link above it should open you to an Excel file that will give you the 2007 schedule for every Division I college football team in the nation. This was sent to me by one of our most loyal readers, and now I pass it on to you...kind of like religion. I don't know who the dude is who made this, but it must have taken him forever to put all those helmets on there. For those of you who can't figure out how to navigate around the spreadsheet....you are beyond help.

For those of you who care, Notre Dame is my team...but only when they are good. Does that make me a 'bandwagon fan'? Your damn right. I try to not watch too much football (it's my offseason from MLB and NBA), but I really hate to watch bad football. On top of that, I hate cold weather so I don't go to football games either. Give me a break, I like to stay warm. Plus, since I live in Bloomington, I get to hear all about IU football and how horrible they are. That's enough for me.

Right now I'm just trying to fill space so that the format of that picture doesn't screw up the whole page. Later on today I'm going to have another post to talk about an upcoming Cobra Brigade Road Trip. We are taking the show on the road and.....it's going to be historical. Not historical like Bill & Ted's Excellent Adventure, but pretty damn close. Ok, I think I have written enough now. Enjoy the spreadsheet and the pic of the USC Song Girls.

Who Shot Mamba???? What the Hell Is It?

Thu, 16 Aug 2007 09:27:49 -0500

Who Shot Mamba? Official Website

As you all should know by now, on Friday's I write over at YAYSports where I cover topics ranging from NBA Basketball to how great Rajon Rondo is. What you may not know is why I do that.....

Back in the day 'The Cavalier' had a grand idea to shoot a movie for his readers. In order to do that he had to take some time off from the site so that he could use all of his time to shoot said movie. During that time a few lucky bloggers were chosen to post over there each day....and I was one of them. Jordi, Ben Cox and StopMikeLupica (before he was fired, which was kind of funny) were also chosen. There was like another dude, but I don't really remember him. Anyways, I think I still get to post over there because people make fun of the stuff I write. It's funny to them, but it hurts me deep inside my soul....

Well, now the movie 'The Cavalier' shot is about ready to come out and a website has been established for it. Since the movie is going to be the greatest film since the original Star Wars, I'm going to instruct you to head over to the Who Shot Mamba? site today....with further instructions to check it out from time to time (and also at times that I tell you to check it out. I'm bossy).

I haven't seen the movie myself, but I've seen some of the other work that 'The Cavalier' has done (I'd link to it but he changed servers and I can't find it) and it's hilarious, so I can safely assume that WSM? is going to be even better. Also...for those of you who want to know exactly what WSM? is, I found this breakdown from when it first began. I'm not sure if all the information is still relevant, but it's something to start with.

*Ok, I was trying to be nice by persuading you to head over to the site. Now I'm going to be honest with you. WSM? is going to be a huge success. It's going to be groundbreaking in its use of sports-related blogs and the Internet. I'm trying to help you out by getting you in on the 'ground floor'. If you don't check this out.....you will not be considered cool. It's that simple.

D-Lee is Killing Me

Thu, 16 Aug 2007 07:42:49 -0500

For a guy who is supposed to be leading the Cubs into the playoffs, Derrek Lee sure is doing a piss poor job of it. I'm not sure if he's injured/tired/depressed/etc., but right now he's just not playing very well and after looking at his stats, he hasn't been for the two months. After hitting a robust .320 in June, Lee followed it up by hitting .257 in July and .264 so far this month. This is the time of the season where the big guns are supposed to step up (look at Pujols and Ryan Braun for examples) and Lee is just shuffling along. I understand that Alfonso Soriano has been out of the lineup for awhile, but the Cubs pay Lee quite a bit of money to drive in runs and lead them to victory....

Now, I'm not saying the Cubs need to get rid of the guy, but he needs to start playing better if the Cubs hope to have any chance of making the playoffs. I nearly threw the remote at my TV last night as I watched Lee strike out after not even swinging during an entire at-bat. I can't remember him doing that too much before. It just doesn't seem like his mind is right....unfortunately, this isn't the time of the season when he can get a day off. Just watching him half run/walk to first base after a walk depresses me. He doesn't look like he's having any fun, which is weird because he's right in the thick of a pennant race. For a guy who was a World Series hero for the Marlins, this seems like a strange thing to happen.

I've been on Lee's case quite a bit this season because of his lack of power and for not taking his suspension during an easy stretch of games, but this is ridiculous. For a guy who is supposed to be the leader.....he's not doing his job and it's costing the Cubs games.

The Return of the Three Headed Monster

Thu, 16 Aug 2007 07:21:27 -0500

It's almost as if I traveled back in time to 2003 or 2004 as I watched the Game Cast of last nights Cardinals game. At least that's the feeling I got as the Cardinals three headed monster appeared out of thin air last night. No, Cerberus did not make his presence felt at Miller Park, (he did usher Bud Selig through the gates of Hades however, free of charge) but the heart of Cardinals past made the Brewers feel their presence. Albert Pujols, Jim Edmonds, and Scott Rolen all homered in the game and totaled 4 RBI in a 8-3 win over the Milwaukee Brewers.

The once prolific trio has fallen on hard times in the last two years due to injuries and what not. Sure, you can still say that Pujols has been putting up great numbers, but when you cut two heads off of a three headed monster, the last remaining head has a lot of extra weight to pull. Pujols is always great, but he alone does not make the Cardinals a great team. The great Cardinals teams existed when the whole trio was performing at 100%.

I'm not so naive to believe that the performances from last night will become the norm for the rest of the season, but it is still nice to see the core of the team thump the ball. The Cardinals now sit only 3.5 games back of the Brewers and only 2 games back of the Cubs. Somehow, someway both of these teams are going to screw this up and not make the playoffs. The collapse thus far would be inconceivable if it wasn't for the fact that both clubs are consumate losers and feel more comfortable within this realm.

Not only did the three headed monster perform last night, but the Cards got another solid pitching performance from a starter. Joel Pineiro won his second game for the Cards while going 7 innings. He even made a kick save and it was a beaut. The Cards finish up their series with the Brewers this afternoon and then head to Wrigley for four games. Jack and I will be at the game on Saturday, where somehow the high temp is supposed to be 67????? If things go well, the Cards will be in 1st place on Sunday and Jack will be stuck in Chicago because he won't want to hear my gloating for 4.5 hours on the drive back.

Workplace Policies Regarding Fantasy Football

Wed, 15 Aug 2007 13:12:10 -0500

Fantasy football season is upon us once again and while I am not the avid fantasy footballer (word?) that some of you might be, I still play in a few leagues each season. It used to be that a majority of my fantasy football 'scouting' and 'strategizing' was done during work hours because.....I guess I didn't want to do it from home? Then, as soon as I started becoming comfortable with my weekly routine....all Yahoo! Fantasy Sports sites were blocked from my computer at work. While there are other avenues of which to play fantasy football, I really don't care that much to look for them, so I would set up my team(s) and spend like 5 minutes a week on them while at home....

I'm not really sure what the policy is at your workplace for fantasy football but just a few minutes ago I rec'd an email at work saying (edited because you don't work for the gov't):

_____-wide Fantasy Football League. Free to play. Good stuff....it's free to play and being pushed throughout the _____(insert branch of gov't).

Ok, that's not really a big deal you say??? Well, let me tell you a long, boring story.....Last year a guy I worked with set up a fantasy football league for a bunch of people who work together to play in. There was a little money (I think $40?) involved, but for the most part it was just because we were bored and at work. He set it up through a site we could view at work, but it wasn't really a site that was worth using because the updates were slow and the waiver wire was a hassle to deal with. This may all seem to be similar to where you work?

I believe I am, at 28, one of the three youngest people that work in my branch. On average I would say the age of the worker here is well over 50 years old. Every day I come into work and listen to people talk about their grandchildren, gardening, Mary Kay parties and an assortment of health issues. I work with Buck, but outside of him, there isn't really anyone I can talk to about anything 'normal'. It makes for a long day, but it's part of my job.

So, like I said, last year I was in this league with a few other guys and on Monday's three of us would get together in an office and talk about the games, rip on each other, etc. You know, how people normally act in the workplace....Well, four weeks into the NFL Regular Season we receive an email from our boss that says, "Meeting. Noon. My office."

I wasn't really sure what the meeting was going to be about. Maybe we had a new project coming up, maybe the boss wanted us to set up a meeting with a vendor...I didn't know. I have a gov't job and because of that it's pretty hard to fire me unless I'm looking at porn at work (which I don't), so I head into the meeting feeling normal. The boss closes the door behind us and says that people are complaining because we are playing fantasy football at work. This blows my mind since people come into work talking about NASCAR (yes) and all the other subjects I told you before. On top of that, they are all old and boring. Of course they aren't going to like us talking about fantasy football, they don't know what it is! One of the other guys in the meeting got a bit pissed and went off on the boss for a few minutes, but it was all supposedly 'off the record', so we were saying pretty much whatever we wanted. At the end the boss told us to not talk about fantasy football so much and all that crap. So, the little bit of fun that I was having at work.....was gone.

Fast forward to today when I rec'd the email detailed above.....that is almost exactly what I got in trouble for last year. So now I'm left wondering what the Hell? Is this some elaborate scheme where they get people to sign up and then fire them for improperly using their gov't computer? I don't know, it just seems very odd to me that just last year this is something that I got into trouble for and just today....I was told it's actually 'being pushed'.

Is mine the only workplace that is like this?

Hinrich Withdraws from Team USA

Wed, 15 Aug 2007 12:13:13 -0500

Yes, this is a basketball post. I know you don't see them around these parts too often, but I figured I needed to mix things up a bit before the Cubs made me pull my hair out.....

Kirk Hinrich decided that he did not want to play for Team USA this Summer and that means that Bulls fans can breathe a sigh of relief. While it would have been nice for Hinrich to get some time playing against the best players in the world, that is not what he, or the Bulls Organization, needs right now. Hinrich is the floor general of the Bulls, and as such, plays a ton of minutes (when he's not in foul trouble). With the expected maturation of Luol Deng, Ben Gordon, Ty Thomas, etc. this season, it's going to be extremely important to have Hinrich on the floor and healthy as much as possible.

There have been a lot of players (Tim Duncan, Shaq, etc.) who have spent their Summer playing for Team USA only to come back to their NBA team burned out which a lot of times leads to injuries. When Michael Jordan and Scottie Pippen played for the original Dream Team, Phil Jackson let them sit out a lot of the pre-season practices and games so that they would be fresh for the season. While it looks like NBA players are excellent athletes and always in shape, the daily grind of the NBA game takes it toll on the body.

Bulls forward Andres Nocioni has also decided to sit out this Summer and not play for his national team. Hinrich and Nocioni are both in similar situations since they never shy away from contact and always play as hard as they can. It would be a shame for these players to play during the Summer and not come back at full strength for the NBA season. It is known that NBA Franchises can't tell their players not to play for their national teams, so it's a smart move by Hinrich and Nocioni to take the intiative to sit out on their own. I imagine that this makes Scott Skiles, John Paxson and Jerry Reinsdorf very happy.....most importantly, it makes me happy. It shows me that these players are not content with exiting from the playoffs in the second round and are intent on coming into training camp at 100%.

Great Expectations....Pffftt....

Wed, 15 Aug 2007 07:19:03 -0500

I'm just sitting here staring at the screen and I'm not sure what to write. The Cubs lost.....again as Carlos Zambrano officially pulled himself out of the running for the NL Cy Young Award. I know Aaron Harang has been tough on the Cubs the past couple of years and all, but come on, it's Aaron Harang. Four hits over the first seven innings and five hits for the game is not going to get the job done. Of course, last night the Cubs decided they would start hitting homers again (three of them), but since no one was on base when they did it they caused very little damage. I don't know, I don't know....the Cubs need to win the last two games of this series because.....We are now back to the point where the Cubs absolutely must win games. They've jacked around enough that they've missed out on opportunities to take over first place and now they are in need of wins.

The Cardinals come into town this weekend and the NL Central race has gone from a two person date, to a date where your ex shows up at the restaurant and decides to join you two. It has become just that uncomfortable. I'm not even sure where the Cardinals came from.....are they playing that much better or are the Cubs just playing that much worse? The Cubs play them four times this weekend and the Cubs need to send a message. I'm going to the game on Saturday with Buck and I can assure you that if the Cubs lose that game I'm going to send a message to the Gods of Drinking and to my liver.

Ugh...I might have pictures from the game last night at some point today. The Lovely Dentist attended with a group of her lady friends and was going to do her best at getting some pics with her Cobra Brigade Press Pass. Seeing as I didn't hear from her after the game....she may have gone on an all night drinking binge and may be laying on a sidewalk along Waveland Avenue, I'm not sure.

Also, I wrote down my thoughts on this three team race in the NL Central over at Epic Carnival, so check it out.

Hit Machine Rolls On

Wed, 15 Aug 2007 07:17:34 -0500

The St. Louis Cardinals must have been feeling smurfy yesterday against the Milwaukee Brewers in their baby blue throwback unis.

In the past two games, the St. Louis Cardinals have pounded out a season high in hits. On Sunday, the Cardinals roped 18 hits against the slumping Los Angeles Dodgers while scoring 12 runs. They did one better on Tuesday by compiling 19 hits against the Milwaukee Brewers. The Cards have went from one of the worst offensive clubs in the NL in their first 35 games of the season to the top tier of the league in their last 80 or so games. If you need proof, check out lboros' post over at Viva El Birdos.

Jim Edmonds led the attack last night with 4 hits and 3 RBI. Edmonds, who is one of the streakiest hitters I have ever seen could finally be hitting his stride. The man is either feast or famine and if he is feasting, the Cards offense looks to be much more productive. Another highlight from last night was Kip Wells picking up his second consecutive win. He has put together 5 quality starts in his last 6 outings and is now 6-13 on the year after a 2-11 start. The Cards now sit only 4.5 games back of the first place Brewers and only 3 games back of the Chicago Cubs. They are still 4 games under .500 and need to concentrate first and foremost on at least evening out that record.

Somehow the Cards are attempting to make a race out of the NL Central in the last two months. There have been multiple times throughout the year where it looked like the Cards needed to shut it down and start thinking about 2008, but they have continuously played well enough for short periods of time to stay in contention. It's amazing that they are within striking distance after everything the team has went through this year (La Russa, Hancock, Carp, injuries, Spiezeo, etc.). Perhaps all these problems have drawn the team closer together, much like what happened in 2002 after Daryl Kile's death. In that year, the Cards had a .553 winning percentage in the first half and came back after the break with a .649 winning percentage. This season the Cards had a .471 winning percentage in the first half and so far sit at .500 in the second half. The comparison is not great considering that the 2002 team was doing well in the first half of the season to begin with, but if the Cards keep playing well for the next month and a half they might have some chance to pull off the division crown.

Final Countdown.....

Tue, 14 Aug 2007 12:57:04 -0500

It feels like it has been forever since I've written a Cubs related article, so sorry about that. Then again, maybe that makes you happy. Anyways, there are 45 games left in the season and right now the Cubs are 60-57 and only 1.5 games out of the NL Central lead and 3 games out of the Wild Card lead. The Cubs have cooled off considerably since their hot June and July, so following is a list of things the Cubs will need over the next 45 games in order to make the playoffs:

- Derrek Lee has to get hot. The guy absolutely must start hitting for some power. He was the definition of sucky on the last road trip. He needs to pick it up and carry this team for a 10-15 game stretch.

- Alfonso Soriano needs to come back healthy. If he comes back and isn't able to steal bases or run at 100% then he's not much better than Matt Murton in LF. Ryan Theriot is doing a decent job leading off, but the Cubs need Soriano to come back and wreak some havoc on the bases.

- Jason Marquis, Sean Marshall and Rich Hill need to pick it up. Between the three of them they need to get 12-15 wins total. They've been getting carried by Ted Lilly and Carlos Zambrano the last few months, so it's time for the boys to step up.

- Aramis Ramirez needs to get healthy. He is the key to the Cubs lineup because he gives support to D-Lee along with getting on base for....

- Mark DeRosa needs to get hot again. I know he's played a lot of games and a lot of different positions but this is the playoff stretch.

- Out of the following group: Felix Pie, Ryan Theriot, Mike Fontenot, Cliff Floyd, Matt Murton, Jason Kendall, Jacque Jones and Angel Pagan....at least three of them have to catch on fire and solidify the starting lineup. The supporting cast is going to be vital coming down the stretch. I'm going to pick Floyd, Theriot and Pie as my three.

- The Cubs need to figure out how they are going to use Ryan Dempster. If he's going to close, let him close. If not, get Marmol/Howry out there and get them ready. To use the mix-up/match-up thing isn't good for anyone.

- Lou Piniella has to use every trick up his sleeve to get the Cubs into the playoffs. Whatever it takes, just get it done. This is what they are paying you the big bucks for

- Relax. Look, it's the Cubs. Everyone is expecting them to choke. Go out there, have fun and win

* My condolences go out to Cliff Floyd and his family as his father passed away after a long health battle.

Another 'Ladies' Entry - Strike Zones and End Zones

Tue, 14 Aug 2007 12:24:49 -0500

For those of you who don't know why I'm doing this:

I usually do a post on cool blogs to read from time to time with links involved. Instead of doing that I'm going to introduce you to new sites that are written by bloggers of the female persuasion. Why? Because, believe it or not, a lot of times guys don't read these sites just because they are written by the ladies. I'm hopeful that you go check out these sites as I write about them because they are good sites with a lot of quality content.

The sites I write about are chosen based on the writing and the quality of the content. Nothing more. This isn't a popularity contest and this isn't a contest to see who's the hottest. I want to make that clear. I won't be posting pics of these ladies and I won't be linking to pics of these ladies. The point of this is to bring quality content to more and more people because people should be reading these sites. Next, these aren't presented in any particular order. I have a list, it's not numbered and I'm just going to go down the list.

Who I'm Reading: Strike Zones and End Zones

Who's Writing There: I know her real name but seeing as she doesn't use it on the site we'll go with SportsGirl365. Pretty catchy, huh? Here's an interview if you want to know more about her. I think she's a combination of StopMikeLupica, MCBias, Deadspin, and Kissing Suzy Kolber. She goes from writing about interesting/controversial subjects to making jokes about everything, so it's a well rounded site.

What They Write About: Well, just about everything. NFL, NBA, MLB, social issues, etc.

What I'm Reading There: Initially I was reading her posts about societal issues such as 'Women Are Ruining Sports' and 'Parents of the Year'. Now I go back from time to time to read almost all of her posts.

Why You Should Check It Out: She's at the top of her game. Pound for pound, word for word....you'd be hard pressed to find a better site about a plethora of topics relating to sports whether it's on the playing field or off of it.

What They Don't Do: She doesn't post every day, but that gives you time to get to her site from time to time to check it out. She doesn't hold her punches as she will go off on rants that will leave your head spinning.

If you guys have been trolling around the net and have found a site I should highlight email me and let me know about it.

Buck Rampage vs Cougar.....The Conclusion

Tue, 14 Aug 2007 07:33:05 -0500

So, where did Jack leave off? Oh yes, the ride to the airport. Now before we get to this much anticipated "Conclusion", I think everyone needs to know that this is my first foray into the world of Cougars. Actually, I'm not sure if you could even call it my own foray, as I was pulled into this situation by said Cougar. She had an unshakable force about her, much like gravity, she was relentless. Without further ado, here it goes.

Note: I believe the Cougar to be 35-40 yrs old. I don't think she is married (ie. no ring). I don't know if she has kids. Those three questions were never asked. I don't believe any of those questions should have been asked in this situation. I disagree with Jack's assessment of "fairly' good looking in the comment section of the first post. I would say she was above that. We'll just say straight up good looking. Especially for a 35-40 yr. old. Totally unbiased opinion. Ha.