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Cobra Brigade The Blogs By Fans Network


May 2008 Archive

May
16
2008

The Story of How Bruce Paine Was Nearly Arrested for Masturbating.

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I have promised several people that I would tell this story, and now I am.  Let it be known that the story, as I am telling it, is true.  Others would claim that I am not being truthful and that I was actually guilty of what the officers accused me of.  I assure you, I was innocent.  I did not do it.  It does sound like something I could be capable of, but I DID NOT DO IT.  This is a faithful narrative of HOW BRUCE PAINE WAS NEARLY ARRESTED FOR MASTURBATING.


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Also on the Network:

√ Things Are Not Looking Good ... [Who Made You Mirabelli?]
√ And So It Begins [C70 At The Bat]
√ Off the Wagon [C70 At The Bat]

May
15
2008
Cobra Brigade Road Show...Buck's Odyssey, Pt. 2
****Since we are leaving soon, we are going to Turn Back the Clock a little bit on some of our best posts. Here is Buck's first trip to Wrigley Field from last July.I have been on somewhat of a...
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May
15
2008
Oh No! Don't Trade Soriano!
By Jack Cobra  |  Comments (10) | Hype It Up!  |   Filed Under: Baseball | Cubs | Featured | Jack Cobra Archive
One of my most respected colleagues in my fantasy baseball league just did the unthinkable......he traded Alfonso Soriano. When I got the email notifying me of the trade I just winced and wished I had been the one trading for...
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May
15
2008
HEY BONO! How is that Africa thing going?
By Bruce Paine  |  Comments (5) | Hype It Up!  |   Filed Under: Bruce Paine Archive | Featured | IU
Kueth Duany of the Syracuse Orangemen meets President Bush.  Duany is a native or war torn Sudan, but the product of good old Bloomington, Indiana.If you are one of my friends, you have probably heard me bitch about Bono.  I...
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May
14
2008
Hank is no Boss...
Before this year, I lived in NYC.  During my time there I learned a lot of things; Pop = soda, a regular slice is simply just cheese, the 2 hour window for a free transfer can make or brake your...
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May
14
2008
It's Ronny Cedeno's World, We're Just Living In It
By Jack Cobra  |  Comments (5) | Hype It Up!  |   Filed Under: Baseball | Cubs | Featured | Jack Cobra Archive
****Since we are leaving soon, we are going to Turn Back the Clock a little bit on some of our best posts. Here I am pushing for Ronny Cedeno to get called up to the Cubs last season. This...
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May
14
2008
It's Time to Adopt
By Jack Cobra  |  Comments (4) | Hype It Up!  |   Filed Under: Baseball | Featured | Jack Cobra Archive
While I will be a Cubs fan until the day I die, every season I pick an American League team to follow and become a fan of. This allows me to learn about a new team, new players and know...
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May
13
2008
Human Growth Hormone: A History of...
****Since we are leaving soon, we are going to Turn Back the Clock a little bit on some of our best posts. This post was originally run on December 19, 2007 and was extremely insightful.Some background:  When I first started...
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May
13
2008
Jim Edmonds Coming to Chicago
By Jack Cobra  |  Comments (9) | Hype It Up!  |   Filed Under: Baseball | Cubs | Featured | Jack Cobra Archive
Yeah, it's gonna happen. Former Cardinals CF Jim Edmonds is on his way to signing with the Cubs and....it's actually a smart move by the Cubs. That was difficult to write.I really, really, really don't like Edmonds, but you know...
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May
13
2008
What is wrong with Horseracing?
By Bruce Paine  |  Comments (8) | Hype It Up!  |   Filed Under: Bruce Paine Archive | Featured
I know a little bit about horses.  One of the benefits of being a poor farm kid from Indiana is that I know a little bit about horses.  This is still a sports site, we aren’t dead yet, and...
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May
9
2008
Cobra Brigade Post #1,000
By Jack Cobra  |  Comments (10) | Hype It Up!  |   Filed Under: Featured | Jack Cobra Archive | Misc.
That is not a typo. Since our 'soft launch' on May 10, 2007 we have posted 1,000 entries. One thousand posts divided by a leap year tells me that we've had about three posts a day for our year of...
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May
9
2008
Pie to Minors.....Good Idea
By Jack Cobra  |  Comments (1) | Hype It Up!  |   Filed Under: Baseball | Cubs | Featured | Jack Cobra Archive
I'm probably the biggest Felix Pie supporter out there but when I read this morning that he might be heading back to Iowa.....I thought it was a good idea. I like what Pie brings to the table with his speed...
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May
9
2008
Buck Rampage vs Cougar.....The Conclusion
****Since we are leaving soon, we are going to Turn Back the Clock a little bit on some of our best posts. Here is Buck's conclusion to his adventure with his Cougar from August 2007. Click Part 1 to...
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May
9
2008
Ray McCallum Gets His Revenge
By Jack Cobra  |  Comments (8) | Hype It Up!  |   Filed Under: Basketball | Featured | IU | Jack Cobra Archive
By now you probably know that Hoosier Nation and the entire Internet is going crazy about Tom Crean's statement about Eli Holman transferring to Detroit Mercy:"We were led to believe that this was a family decision and that he wanted...
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May
8
2008
Thoughts on the Cubs/Cardinals Series
By Jack Cobra  |  Comments (3) | Hype It Up!  |   Filed Under: Baseball | Cubs | Featured | Jack Cobra Archive
Yes, the series was last weekend but A) I haven't written about it and B) there was a request for it, so here are some random thoughts about the series that the Cardinals won. - I'm still not sold on...
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May
8
2008
Hoeppner More Than Just A Coach
****Since we are leaving soon, we are going to Turn Back the Clock a little bit on some of our best posts. Here is Paine's post after the passing on former IU Head Football Coach Terry Hoeppner, which ran on...
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May
8
2008
Cubs Looking to Upgrade
By Jack Cobra  |  Comments (3) | Hype It Up!  |   Filed Under: Baseball | Cubs | Featured | Jack Cobra Archive
As if going 4-9 over their last 13 games wasn't bad enough, it now looks like the Cubs are quickly coming to the conclusion that they need a left-handed hitting power hitter in the middle of their lineup. If only...
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May
8
2008
Back from Black: Dom Rhodes is a Colt again.
After a year in Oakland, Dominic Rhodes is returning to the Colts' stable to find his place in the gates for the 2008 season.  I can't help but be excited about this addition.  What was perhaps the thinest position in...
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May
7
2008
Nothing Rhymes with Votto
By Jack Cobra  |  Comments (3) | Hype It Up!  |   Filed Under: Baseball | Cubs | Featured | Jack Cobra Archive
Coming into the game today Reds 1B Joey Votto had 4 homers and 14 RBI's on the season. Respectable numbers for an up and coming power hitter. He's not exactly putting fear into your heart before the game but he's...
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May
7
2008
Hello.....We are Cobra Brigade
By Jack Cobra  |  Comments (2) | Hype It Up!  |   Filed Under: Featured | Jack Cobra Archive | Misc.
****There was a request for some of our 'Greatest Hits' now that we are leaving, so I'll try to post maybe one every day. This was our intro post a couple of weeks after we started. It initially ran...
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May
7
2008
Does IU Athletics Have a Drug Problem?
By Jack Cobra  |  Comments (5) | Hype It Up!  |   Filed Under: Featured | IU | Jack Cobra Archive
****this will be my last IU related post so I'll go ahead and piss everyone off with it.With QB Kellen Lewis being suspended from the IU Football Team because of drug issues and the IU Basketball Team reportedly failing 19!...
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May
6
2008
Playmates, Celebrities, Derby, Free Booze = So Jealous!!!
While reading/weeping through Jack's farewell warning post and comments earlier I noticed that MCBias mentioned the classic Cougar posts (1, 2). Well, no news to report here. Last time I talked to the cougar was four or five months ago...
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May
6
2008
**Site News -- The End is Near
Well folks, we are coming up on our one year anniversary of being a blog and you know what??? It's about time for us to pack up our bags and move along. Keep reading to find out how this blog...
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May
5
2008
Bruce Paine gets naked for you.
Back at the first of the year, Jack mentioned that he wanted me to tell more stories about guns and politics and knives and hurting and nudity.  He wanted me to branch out and do more for the Brigade,...
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May
3
2008
What the F#&% is going on with Marvin Harrison?!
By Bruce Paine  |  Comments (12) | Hype It Up!  |   Filed Under: Featured | Football
   It is no secret that I worship the ground that Marvin Harrison walks on.  So, I have no idea what to say about the reports circulating that he was involved in a shooting in North Philadelphia Tuesday afternoon. ...
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May
2
2008
BRUCE PAINE GOES TO HOLLYWOOD!
By Bruce Paine  |  Comments (6) | Hype It Up!  |   Filed Under: Bruce Paine Archive | Featured
   They're gonna put me in the movies.  They're gonna make a big star outa me.  I'll be the biggest fool to ever hit the big time.      You thought the scar on my forehead and my shipped teeth would...
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May
1
2008
Cubs Blow Game in Ninth Inning
By Jack Cobra  |  Comments (1) | Hype It Up!  |   Filed Under: Baseball | Cubs | Featured | Jack Cobra Archive
Carlos Zambrano and the Cubs looked like they were going to cruise to a victory today until they realized they left their brains on cruise control in the ninth inning and ended up losing to the Brewers 4-3. The Brewers...
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May
1
2008
Soto Slugs Cubs Past Brewers
By Jack Cobra  |  Comments (3) | Hype It Up!  |   Filed Under: Baseball | Cubs | Featured | Jack Cobra Archive
In a game that certainly made your scorecard look like chicken scratch, the Cubs pounded the Brewers 19-5 on Wednesday night as Geovony Soto led the way with two home runs and six runs batted in. I'm not sure you can...
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Spring Training 08