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Different Day, Different Heroes.....

By Jack Cobra  |  Comments (19) | Hype It Up!  |   Filed Under: Baseball | Jack Cobra Archive
murton.3.jpgMatt Murton. Carlos Marmol. If I have four boys at some point in the future I may name them after these guys after last night. The M & M boys put it together for the Cubs last night in their victory over the Brewers to push the Cubs 2.5 games up in the NL Central and knock the Magic Number down to 29. This game nearly was the end of me. I'll be honest, I may not make it to the end of September. The Lovely Dentist is worried about me....and I'm not kidding.

If I said the game started out rough that would be a vast understatement as Ted Lilly was absolutely horrendous in the first inning. He gave up a lead-off homer to Rickie Weeks and then....I think I blacked out for a few minutes and when I came to the Cubs were down 2-0 quicker than you could say Ron Santo's toupee. The Cubs came back with three runs of their own in the second and then Lilly gave up that lead in the third. Awesome. Whoa! I almost forgot.

I know I've gone over this three days in a row, but come on.....Ted Lilly does not know how to bunt. I'm sorry, he just doesn't. He screwed the Cubs again in the second inning when they needed him to lay down a sacrifice bunt to move the runners to second and third. He couldn't get the job done. Luckily....I was watching very closely, so let me give you some tips, Theodore. First, you have to actually square your body around to where both of your shoulders are facing the pitcher, or where it looks like your hips could take a photograph of the picture if they were a camera. I don't know who the Hell is letting you get away with what you are doing every day, but it's pathetic. Next, you are up there to lay down a bunt, so get in position to do so. Spreading your legs really far apart and moving around in the box does nothing for you and it actually.....hurts you. Find a spot, move your legs to about shoulder width apart and settle down. Last, bunt strikes. Put your bat at the top of the strike zone. If the pitch is above the bat, let it go. If it's below it...holy shit, that makes it easier to get it on the ground. When you botched this bunt in the second inning I threw my bottle of water down the hallway in my house and then kicked it into my back room while cursing not only you, but your Mother. I'm not a violent person Ted, please learn how to bunt. It really isn't that difficult.

alfonso.2.jpgBack to the game....Lilly settled down and actually threw five innings before the Cubs needed some Marmol-aide (t-shirt idea anyone?). With the exit of Lilly and entrance of Marmol it also brought the presence of Matt Murton on a double switch and the stage was set. Murton came up as the third batter in the sixth and he actually worked the count in his favor before smoking a 3-1 pitch through the blowing wind and into the left field seats. Then, just as quickly as you could say 'fire down below', Alfonso Soriano (who looked horrible all night long at the plate) golfed one into the left field seats.....Boom.  5-3 Cubbies. By now I was jumping up and down throughout my house while praising the God who brought us Matt Murton.

Marmol went on to throw two scoreless innings, striking out five and letting the Brewers know who the best reliever in the NL Central is. The guy is just plain filthy, there is no other way to say it. Bobby Howry threw his inning and then the Cubs brought in Ryan Dempster......

I know Dempster scares a lot of Cubs fans, he scares the Hell out of me, but he gets the job done one way or another. Sure, there are times when he implodes and gives up a ton of runs, but most times he shuts the door. Now, I'm not going to go through what happened in play by play form, but Kevin Mench did come up with the bases loaded, two outs and the Cubs up 5-4. Dempster had followed up a Prince Fielder intentional walk (to load the bases) with a walk to Corey Hart and I could feel my blood pressure going through the roof. Mench made it easy on us as he grounded into a force play to end the game....and put the Cubs up more games in the NL Central than the Mets are up in the NL East (look it up). With the Cardinals loss yesterday, things are looking good for the Cubs. They now have Houston coming into the Friendly Confines for three games over the weekend and they won't be facing Roy Oswalt in the series. They will be facing two left handers, but....come on, the Cubs are due to go on a streak where they beat up on those lefties, aren't they? Please?!

*Also, I almost forgot. The dude who sits behind home plate in the pink hat is a douchebag, Fragile Frankie Merman is correct.

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gianluca said

I'm posting this from rehab after getting arrested for buying hillbilly heroin last night. Lilly with 100 pitches in the 4th put me over the edge. The baseball package had the brewers broadcast and their announcers
went apeshit at the call when Hart struck out looking in the 7th. I realize I was slightly intoxicated but thought it was an outstanding pitch.

One other thought til the dt's kick in. There is some fat dude with a pink hat that sits behind the plate. He must be removed or killed.

Jack Cobra said

That was a horrible strike call on Hart but I think it was a make up call from a pitch or two earlier that the ump missed.

gianluca said

oops Cobra, sorry, you wrote about the fat dude already. I stopped reading after you explained bunting to me for the 300th time this week.

Hoosiernation said

The good ole' double switch by Lou was quite a move. It worked out great on offense and defense with Marmol but there was an exception of Murton's bonehead play in the field which every Cub fan could see coming. Marmol was scary last night. What a changeup from a lefty Lilly and his throwing motion to righty Marmol and his violent throwing motion. The problem with Dempster is he always seems to invite trouble with walks like last night.

Jack Cobra said

Once they start getting those bunts down I'll stop writing about it. It's going to keep costing them runs....

I totally forgot to write about that Murton screw up...

Klompus said

Jack, I attended the game last nite and cant recall a louder wrigley in my life.

it was magical to see murton and soriano go back to back.

the ump was horrendous all game. i was sitting behind homeplate in the upperdeck, and couldnt tell exact locations of pitches. but i was the Southwest Plane View Camera, and the ump sucked.

Pinella's managing was phenominal. i even said to my buddy, "this is when your manager manages and he's either right on or way off. he's gonna get praised or booed." when he issued the intentional walk to fielder. he had to take the bat out of his hands in that situation.

jack...lay off the bunt rips. they are throwing 88mph fastballs high as shit, only few players can get that down.

pink hat guy sucks. ive talked to him. he sucks.

bring on houston, lets make them HUMBLE.

Fragile Frankie won't talk to me this morning...i think he just lets ozzie speak for him now.

Jack Cobra said

you don't try to bunt at balls that are high, that's the point. they have no idea what they are doing up there.

When Fielder came up Bob and Len were talking about whether the Cubs were going to pitch to him or not and it looked like they would. All of a sudden the camera pans to the dugout and you see Lou going, "Jason!! Jason!!" with the four fingers up. Then right after Kendall saw that you could see Lou saying, "Jesus Christ, what was he thinking?"

Klompus said

Managing. Managing. Managing.

Predictions for the Houston series?

Jack Cobra said

Pain.....for Houston.

Fragile Frankie Merman said

So when is the parade?

Fragile Frankie Merman said

So when is the parade?

Jack Cobra said

When there is a parade you will know it because the entire city will shut down instead of just the waste management department like when the Sox won it.

gianluca said

Cobra - thanks my two favorit quotes:

"My ultimate goal as a model is to prove that dreams really do come true if you work really hard. I don't have to be the next Gisele but I would like to be known as someone who made it as a savvy buisnesswoman. Not just a pretty face and big boobs! Oh, and I am 1 1/2 inches too short for Next Top Model! LOL!"

I thought her next line was going to be about world peace and then these two gems:

"Everything good in life is worth waiting for."

"I have kissed another girl just for fun. I have always known exactly on what side of the line I stand."

My faith in centerfolds restored.

Jack Cobra said

I do what I can. You deserved something after putting up with my rants about bunting all week.

Erin said

Strangely, until the other night, I had never heard the Cubs' "victory song." And, I'm sorry, but it really sucks. It sounds like a sitcom theme song. In fact, I swear that when I heard it, it reminded me a lot of this (which, by the way, I've had memorized since childhood):


Maybe it's weird, but it's the first thing I thought of. Oh, and watch that, and then tell me just what you think Mark Linn-Baker was reading in the paper that made him so content.

Jack Cobra said

Agreed. Word is that they are looking for a new song but that one has been around so long that it's hard to replace it....no youtube at work for me, boo

Hoosiernation said

I've yet to hear a good team song. In fact they are all absoltely ridiculous. There were some NFL teams with theme songs a couple of years ago and I laughed at each one of them. Anyone remember the Bengals and Bootsy Collins?

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